Eugene -- my, uh...adventure....

-Eugene
Hey, everyone - Rapunzel wanted me to tell you guys that she and Zarina have not posted this week because... A) Tangled Fan's been hoarding the tablet  B ) Rapunzel's been wanting to spend time with the girls and I this week...so she feels slightly guilty for leaving you all hanging and C ) you'll hopefully be seeing some posts from the ladies sometime this weekend, maybe. 

Ahh, so I'm a lucky guy: four perfect kiddos and a beautiful wife, plus I just sort of lived through something most dolls don't, and I still have all of my limbs! 
Well, the morning I disappeared, the dogs were in the house.  They were getting fed, and that's a typically crazy time, so I slipped under a recliner until the madness died down.  As soon as the dogs had eaten and the food bowls taken away, I thought I could just slip out to talk to Tangled Fan.  Riiight.  One of the dogs -  a small, brown and white dog that appeared cute but was in reality a monster - saw me, and grabbed me around my midsection.  Being the dork I am, I froze up and couldn't even yell.  That's when all of the dogs suddenly needed outside - right after feeding time, of course - and in the barking, jostling, and bouncing madness, I got lost in the fray.  The dog still had me around the midsection, but Tangled Fan didn't even notice me as she opened the door and left all the dogs -and me - outside. 
Well, okay.  I could just yank away and be on my way, right? 
Nah, of course not. 
The one dog snarled at the dog carrying me, and in her anger, she dropped me.  I quickly rolled away, trying to go unseen, but that's when I failed to realize that I was by the edge of the ramp.  You see, the ramp is very long, and actually has three levels - I'm not sure how to explain it, but it zigzags - and I fell down to a lower level, and I guess that's when I was knocked out.

When I woke up, I was buried under a lot of dirt.  A lot.  It's a good thing that dolls can survive when they're mushed under things like plastic, other dolls in containers, or dirt - because if not, I would've been dead for sure. 
I don't know how long it took me to dig my way out from under the heavy dirt, but it was nighttime when I was out in the fresh air again.  It was really, really cold, and I didn't really know what to do with myself.  I'm thinking that I was probably under the dirt for at least a few days, if not a week. 
When I got out, I sat and thought.  I knew I'd need a hiding spot for when morning came and the dogs were left outside, but I had to wait until dawn to be able to see.  That was nerve-wracking.  That backyard is pretty big for people and dogs, so just imagine what it looked like to a doll a fifth the size of humans!  Massive.  That's how big - massive.  It takes almost a whole day to explore Tangled Fan's bedroom, right?  This backyard dwarfed her room.  I'm not even joking. 

So as soon as dawn came, I was able to make a run for the fort at the top of the swing set and slide that are set up for Tangled Fan's niece and nephew.  Let me tell you, that was a hard climb.  It was taller than the big shelving unit, remember the shelving unit?  The one Rapunzel fell off of that time?  It was slightly taller than that. 
Anyway, I got up there about an hour before the dogs invaded the backyard. 
The bad thing?  The stupid dogs were outside almost all day long.  I couldn't risk leaving my hiding spot, so I used the day to survey the backyard, checking out how I could move and be able to get to cover quickly, if need be.  One of the more interesting experiences of the day was when a cat came up to the fort, threw its food up, and then went in a corner, curling up to sleep the day away.  That was lovely.  (I'm oozing sarcasm here, in case anyone fails to realize that!)  But the plus side was that it came back to sleep there after its evening meal (and the food didn't come back to haunt her this time, which was a plus) and she allowed me to lay down beside her to sleep.  It had started raining, so I couldn't do anything, especially not in the dark.  The cat kept me nice and warm, at least! 
At the crack of dawn the next day, I left the fort via the slide.  It was still raining, but I couldn't just stand around forever - I needed to get back to my family. 
I didn't take into account that the backyard was probably bigger than it appeared when I had almost a bird's eye view (okay, so a bird's eye view for dolls).  I just barely made it to hide in the garden before the dogs went out.  I at least made it that far, and the rain soon left.  But then, I had the added risk of two of the Miniature Horses being left in the backyard.  I've never seen the likes:  using tiny horses for lawnmowers.  Hey, it works.  But I had to dodge hooves, especially since they were two young horses and liked to play a bit.  And walk clumsily through the garden, picking grass out from around the plants.  Yeesh. 
Well, at one point, I got too close to one of the horses, and he stepped on my feet.  Three hundred pound Miniature horse versus a 1/2 pound hunk of plastic, what do you think it's gonna do?  I managed to drag myself back to the slide and work my way up to the fort again, and by that time, I wasn't sure if I could ever walk again.  I was so sore everywhere, and my hip joints were about to give out. 
I made myself stay there for about...I don't even know how long, until I was able to walk again.  After that, I was super careful to watch out for horses as well as dogs.  Good grief! 
I know you're probably asking why no humans noticed I was here?  Well, it's because they don't generally tend to come down by the swing set unless it's the three-year-old nephew.  I met him when I was in the fort recovering...and when he attempted stomping on me to break me, I managed to climb up to the top beam, where the swings hang from.  It was evening before he left, so that was another day wasted. 
The next morning, I hoofed it for the garden once more. 
When I was back in the garden, I stayed there, despite some more rain.  It cleaned me up, anyway.  When the dogs would come around, I would just duck under some sprawling strawberry plants and flatten myself to the ground - they didn't even notice me.  When they were shut in for the night, I started to look around and revise my plan of action. 
As soon as it was light enough for me to see again, I made a quick run to the clothesline posts.  I was halfway through the yard, thank goodness.  As soon as I was there, I decided to go hide in the flower garden, which was really super close by.  There were a lot of nice, tall plants and ferns to hide under!  I would've picked some of the smaller flowers for Rapunzel and the girls, but I knew they'd wilt before I could get them to them. 
Anyway, I waited until the dogs were, once more, shut in for the night before I decided how I could climb to get to the doorknob - the only thing keeping me from getting into the house and being home free. 
By morning, I had that figured out.  There was a small table holding a potted plant near the door, so I took a flying leap and clung to the doorknob, twisting and squirming until it was open. 

Stupid me. 
That's where the dogs stay at night.
As soon as I realized that, I raced for and dove under the sink. 
One of the dogs saw me - an old, grumpy male - but he left me alone, trotting ahead to catch up with the others.  Whew. 
I was able to make my way through the laundry room in a day, and got into the downstairs family room, where I finally allowed myself to sleep for a little while, curled up at the top of the cat tower.  At least, until a cat came and, both irritated at my stealing his nap spot but also intrigued with me, batted me over the edge of the platform.  I was able to catch myself, luckily, and work my way down slowly.  Yeesh. 
Well, after that I crawled into the hammock-like part of the tower, and slept there.  Nobody bothered me, then. 
It took another day for me to creep through the family room; I thought I would be home free after that. 
Pshh, I forgot about the 'downstairs' part.  There were stairs.  A lot of them.  I managed, though; and after that, I could hardly walk once more.  As soon as I got upstairs, I hid behind the couch because those stinking dogs were inside once more.  When I was behind the couch, I slept for the day, hoping my legs would heal up by morning.  Even though they didn't, I still made my way through the hallway and got to Tangled Fan's bedroom, where I had to climb to open the door.  That about did me in....it wasn't easy. 
Then, I knew I was in the homestretch and at around nine-fifteen, I finally made it up onto the table, where I got attacked by two certain little girls that I'd missed a lot! 
So there you have it....a very condensed version, at least. 
It's good to be back. 

Last night's events...

At around nine last night, I was trying to get the girls to wind down for a story before bed.  It's no easy task to get two young girls and a baby settled by yourself, as you could imagine....but I'd been managing to do so.  Making up stories to tell to the girls seemed to do all of us good; it kept me thinking about other things, and they seemed to appreciate me finally picking up something Eugene had done quite often for them.  Even Audrey appreciated it.  Zachary even normally settled down to listen in, but he'd been tuckered out and had gone to bed early. 

 I'd just gotten everyone gathered up on the couch, with Pascal in Jordan's lap, and had begun my tale when we all heard someone coming up onto the table.  First, a large hand appeared, and then a head, and with a grunt, the mystery doll had heaved their body up onto the table.  Only...said doll wasn't a mystery doll.
It. 
Was. 
Eugene. 

He stood slowly and stiffly, and we all stared at him. My heart thundered, skipped, and squeezed in a mix of emotions tumbling over one another.  A gasp tore through me and I let my hand fly to my mouth.  Tears clouded my eyes, but I saw the two older girls scramble off of the couch and fling themselves at him.  Chuckling, he bent to pick them both up, kissing their foreheads and gushing over how much he'd missed them.  Jordan caught sight of him and giggled, clapping her hands and bouncing on her bottom. 
I wanted to grab him into a hug and never let go of him, but I waited my turn, watching as our girls welcomed their Daddy home.  My heart swelled, and I'm pretty sure I fell in love with him all over again, seeing how he laughed and hugged his girls a little tighter.  He looked up to catch my eye, and I dropped my hand from my mouth to smile tearfully at him.  He winked, giving me that beautiful smile I'd missed so much, and then ducked his head again to kiss his daughters' foreheads.
He took as long as he needed with Audrey and Casey.  No way were they going to sleep anytime soon, I imagined!  But after a little bit, they let go of him and wanted to know what kind of stories he was sure to have brought back with him.
"I'll tell you all a little bit, but after that, you have to promise to go to sleep then so you can wake up bright and early in the morning to hear the rest of it, okay?  It's you guys' bedtime already," he told them, and they reluctantly agreed.  "That's my girls.  Now, you two go get settled on the couch while I say hello to your momma, okay?"
They agreed, their faces shining with anticipation and happiness, and my heart leaped into my throat when he met my eyes.  Standing up, I made my way almost shyly over to him, not quite sure I even believed that he was alive and home.  He reached out for my hands and gave me an expression of sheer adoration.
"Boy, is it good to see you..." he grinned. 
I smiled shyly.  "You have no idea.  I love you so much."  Unable to contain myself one more second, I grabbed him into a tight hug, and he reached to do the same; pulling me as close as possible.  I smiled into his shoulder; his mere touch enrapturing me.  I could've remained in that embrace forever, but I let him slip away after only a few seconds. 
"We'll talk later," he promised quietly, adding a soft kiss on my cheek for good measure.
I nodded before following him to the couch. 
When he sat, he scooped Jordan up into his arms, despite the two girls vying for spots on his lap.  When he managed to get all three squeezed onto his lap, he finally realized he was missing someone and looked up at me, his eyes widening with concern. 
"Where's the little guy?" 
"He's sleeping in bed," I reassured him, and he nodded, letting his shoulders lower in relief before slipping into a very simple version of the beginning of his adventures; it was enough to captivate the girls, though, and they were reluctant to go to bed when the first part of his story came to a close at approximately eleven o' clock....despite their tiredness.  We got them to bed, though, and I quickly slipped behind the cutout to get changed for bed while he watched Zachary sleep for a few minutes.
I'd just gotten the bed made when I felt two strong arms grab me round my waist, and he leaned his chin on my shoulder.  I didn't even try to keep the smile off of my face.
"Ready for bed?  I can't wait until tomorrow....I'm hoping Zachary lets me at least hold him for a few seconds.  You'll need to catch me up on everything," he whispered. 
I smiled a bit wider, turning around in his arms to face him.  "Mmhmm...I will, but you have to catch ME up first.  And no promises with Zach letting you hold him, but we'll see.  He's gotten a little better!"
He grinned, cupping my cheeks in his hands.  He opened his mouth to say something, but I snaked my arms around his neck and pulled him into a kiss before he could start his sentence.  He dropped his hands from my face and instead let them slide down my sides before resting around my waist, pulling me closer.  When our lips parted, he met my eyes with a loving expression. 
"I missed you," he said quietly, bumping his forehead against mine. I gave him another teary-eyed smile, and he dropped a couple quick kisses onto my brow before leading me over to the edge of the bed.  He sat down and collected me up into his lap for a couple of minutes.  "Now...before I get into what all happened, I want to warn you before I forget:  I might have some nightmares, and I'll probably be up through the night.  Don't worry, though, okay?  And I apologize in advance if I wake you up....I've been, uh...having pretty bad ones.  Nightmares, I mean," he admitted sheepishly. 
I nodded, my brows furrowing.  What had he gone through?!
I won't include his tale in here right now; he said he would post it himself on here very soon. It was one in the morning before he  finally finished the tale, so it's a long one.

When he finally finished, he stretched his back with a grunt.  "Climbing so much really did me in. Basically every inch of my body aches!" I nodded empathetically, staring at him with concern.  He caught on and smiled at me, reaching over to kiss the tip of my nose.  "I'll be fine.  But enough about me.  What's been going on here?  Or are you too tired?" 
I shrugged.  Quite honestly, I was beyond tired, but at the same time, I was so happy and excited that I probably COULDN'T sleep.  If that makes sense...have you ever had that feeling? "I don't know if I'll be able to sleep, but I'm sure you're really tired, huh?" 
"You bet.  But why won't you be able to sleep?"  he flopped down on his side, reaching behind him with one hand to rub at what must've been a particularly sore spot on his back. 
"Well, for one, I'm excited because I thought I'd never see you again-"
"Why'd you think that?  How long was I gone?"  he asked, quirking a brow. 
"Almost a month...I-I thought you were dead.  We all did," I muttered, dropping my gaze away from him to my lap when I felt my eyes fill with tears.  Just thinking about it got me upset.
His eyebrows furrowed.  "Oh, honey...c'mere." 
I shook my head.  "I'll be fine.  I'm sorry,"
"About what?" 
"It was my fault.  If it weren't for me, you wouldn't have been going to talk to Tangled Fan, and--"
"Hey.  Enough of that!  You and the girls are the only reason I stayed determined enough to come home, just for the record." 
I swallowed, nodding.  When I knew I was composed once more, I smoothed the blanket over him like I always did before curling underneath them myself, turning on my side to face away from him, at least until I was positive I could look at his face without crying.  Within a couple of seconds, he pulled me close up against him, tucking some hair away from my ear before slipping an arm snugly around my midsection.  I put my own hand over his, lacing my fingers with his and sighing shakily. Oh, how I'd missed him!  But he wasn't about to go to sleep quite yet--of course not.
"You blamed yourself the entire time I was gone, right?"  he whispered.
"Mmmh...It doesn't matter, rest up,"
He sighed in frustration.  "I don't know why you blame yourself for everything...it was the dog's fault, honey.  How can I be so crazy over you if you're so frustrating?" he teased.
I giggled quietly.  "Sorry." 
Chuckling, he cuddled up just a little closer to me before going to sleep.

I woke up at around 3 in the morning to Eugene tossing and turning, mumbling and breathing as though he was running a marathon.  His face was pinched and worried, so I propped myself up on one elbow and started shaking his shoulder, talking quietly to try to get him to wake up out of the nightmare.  With a gasp, he finally woke up and shot straight upright in bed.  I quickly sat up, too, and put a hand on his shoulder a moment before pulling him into a hug.
"It's just a nightmare," I whispered.  "You're okay." 
He buried his face into the crook of my neck, much like the kids do when they're upset, scared, or tired, and my heart squeezed with empathy.  I gave him a couple of quick kisses behind his ear and rested my cheek up against his head, keeping my arms around him until he calmed down.  When he finally pulled out of the hug, he took a deep, shuddering breath. 
"Did I wake you?" he whispered.
"It's fine," I said quietly, reaching to smooth his collar. 
"I'll go sleep on the couch--" he started to leave the bed, and I grabbed his arm. 
"Um, no you're not!"
"I don't want to wake you, though...you--"
"I don't care, Eugene; you're sleeping in bed.  It'll be better for your joints, too." I added. 
Plus, I didn't care about being woken up; the love of my life was home after almost a month--like fun I cared if he woke me up having a nightmare!  He took another deep breath, and I reached to give him another quick hug before he settled  back down under the blanket.  I curled up with the blanket up to my chin, and he reached to pull me close to him once again, sucking in another deep breath that was no less shuddering than the one before. Within minutes, I was back asleep, but I don't know about him.